Why you shouldn’t ‘be yourself’ at work

‘Be yourself’ is the defining careers advice of the moment. It’s heard everywhere from business leaders in the boardroom to graduation day speeches. It’s so common it’s even a hiring tool for some companies.

One person striving to successfully heed this advice is Michael Friedrich, the Berlin-based vice-president of ScribbleLive, a Canadian software company. For Friedrich, being himself involves wearing shorts to work, and telling prospective clients he’s sleeping on a friend’s living-room floor while he finds a home of his own.

Playing by his own rules has worked well so far, Friedrich says. Thanks to the foreign languages, and well-honed intercultural skills picked up while travelling instead of going to university, he’s landed well-paying jobs. And, despite his unconventional behaviour at ScribbleLive, he’s won a major promotion.

(Credit: ScribbleLive London)

Michael Friedrich bids farewell to his London colleagues before embarking on an 800-mile bicycle ride to Berlin, Germany (Credit: ScribbleLive London)

“I don’t worry about image in the traditional sense. I am the way I am,” says the 44-year-old. “I accept what I’m like and I celebrate it.”

But is ‘be yourself’ good advice for everyone? Just how much of yourself should you reveal to your colleagues? And, are some of us more suited to this ethos than others?

Blurred boundaries 

‘Being yourself’ can backfire in certain circumstances, says Professor Herminia Ibarra, an expert in organisational behaviour and leadership at London Business School and Insead in France.

For instance, her research suggests that people who have been promoted are at risk of failing in their new role if they have a fixed idea of their own ‘authentic’ personality. Rather than adapting their behaviour to fit their changed status, they carry on exactly as before. For instance, someone who sees themselves as open and friendly may share too much of their thoughts and feelings, thus losing credibility and effectiveness, she explains.

(Credit: Benedict Johnson)

Just been promoted to manager? Professor Herminia Ibarra says it’s not always wise to carry on behaving the same way (Credit: Benedict Johnson)

“A very simple definition [of authenticity] is being true to self,” says Ibarra. “But self could be who I am today, who I’ve always been or who I might be tomorrow.”


People can use authenticity as an excuse for staying in their comfort zone, says Ibarra. Faced with change, “oftentimes they say ‘that’s not me’ and they use the idea of authenticity to not stretch and grow”.

People can use authenticity as an excuse for staying in their comfort zone

The ease with which you adapt your behaviour to fit new situations depends to what degree you’re a ‘chameleon’ or a ‘true-to-selfer’, according to Mark Snyder, a social psychologist at the University of Minnesota. He created a personality test to measure this, called the Self-Monitoring Scale.

Chameleons treat their lives as an opportunity to play a series of roles, carefully choosing their words and deeds to convey just the right impression, says Snyder. In contrast, true-to-selfers use their social dealings with others to convey an unfiltered sense of their personalities, he says.

(Credit: Getty Images)

‘Chameleons’ may change their tune to suit whoever’s in the room – but they are more likely to get ahead, says Mark Snyder (Credit: Getty Images)

The problem with ‘be yourself’ as careers advice is that chameleons have a bit of an edge, says Snyder. That’s because a lot of jobs, particularly ones that are at higher levels in corporations, call for acting and self-presentational skills that favour people who change their deeds to fit the situation.

Earning your stripes

Other research suggests it’s only as you progress up the career ladder that you have the licence, power and opportunity to be authentic. It takes time to earn what sociologists call “idiosyncrasy credits”.

“Senior people have tried, experimented, trial-and-errored different versions of self, found whatever works for them, and consolidated a style,” says Ibarra. “They advise students and junior staff to ‘be yourself’ with good intent, forgetting that it’s been a 30-year process.”

It’s not bad advice. It’s just not particularly useful advice

Part of the danger in simply telling people to ‘be yourself’ is that they might think that’s all they need to do, says Jeremiah Stone, a New York-based recruitment specialist at Hudson RPO.

(Credit: Getty Images)

‘Being yourself’ can only get you so far – you’ve got to be able to back it up (Credit: Getty Images)

“It doesn’t mean that you go into an interview or a workplace environment and you behave in the same way you would with your mates. It means that you are engaging authentically with other people, that they get a sense of who you are and what’s important to you and what your values are,” he says. “It’s not bad advice. It’s just not particularly useful advice”

Even Friedrich is unconvinced by ‘be yourself’ as words of wisdom – particularly for younger people. “The advice ‘be yourself’ – that’s starting in the middle. How can you be yourself if you don’t know yourself?” he says. “Get to know yourself and find out what makes you happy.”

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This CEO says her riskiest career move was becoming an engineer

I like this words: “There’s never a perfect time for anything—you just have go for it and keep your eyes on your goal.”

girlswhocodeWritten by Anne Kreamer
August 25, 2015

In the US, where only 11% of working engineers are women and fewer than 5% of the CEOs of the 500 biggest companies are female, Jennifer Van Buskirk, the president of Cricket Wireless, a subsidiary of AT&T, is something of a freak. In a good way.

Van Buskirk, 42, chose a course of study that many thought was then “risky” for a woman—becoming an engineer. In 1991, when she entered Virginia Tech, she says women and minorities comprised only 15% of engineering students (pdf) nationwide and were much less likely than men to be employed in engineering once they did graduate.

“I was definitely not taking the easy route,” Van Buskirk told Quartz. “I was typically one of the only women in my college classes and often had to work harder than my male counterparts to be heard.”

She says she found the experience exhilarating. “I really liked breaking the mold and challenging the stereotypes about women. Probably because I was confident in my analytical skills and my ability to learn and adapt, so no matter what obstacles were thrown my way, I knew I could figure a way around them.”

In her approach to her education and prospective career, Van Buskirk intuitively understood two critical components of successful risk-taking. She embraced what Stanford University psychology professor Carol Dweck calls a “growth” mind-set, which is a belief in one’s ability to learn, change, and handle challenges. The other attribute is what University of Pennsylvania psychologist Angela Duckworth, calls “grit,” which is “the sustained and focused application of talent over time.”

When AT&T acquired Cricket from Leap Wireless in 2013 the company was losing about a million subscribers a year, but under Van Buskirk’s leadership, it now boasts 5 million subscribers. What she considers her greatest risk, taking a job she knew nothing about, has proven to be worth taking.

I asked Van Buskirk about how she’s navigated professional risk and here’s what she said.

Van Buskirk:

“I’ve taken a lot of perceived risks in my career.

In fact, that sense of confidence, which was formed in me at an early age, has been the lynchpin of my career success. It has enabled me to embrace risk and leverage it versus run from it. In 2005, I put that confidence to the test when I responded to a request from Ralph de la Vega, our current head of Mobility & Business Solutions at AT&T. Back then, Ralph wanted me to interview for his chief of staff role. While this probably doesn’t sound like a very risky move—especially when you compare it to starting Aio Wireless or Cricket Wireless–it sure felt like it—for two reasons.

Reason number one: I knew nothing about the job—literally, zero. And reason number two: I was seven months pregnant at the time.

I was pretty certain I could learn the role, but I remember looking at my pregnant belly and saying to myself, ‘I’m never going to get this job – who would hire me like this?’ And even if I did get hired, would it be career-suicide to jump into a demanding, high profile, new role just to step out to give birth, then jump back in? How much pressure would I be putting on my family and myself in order to make all this work?

And, of course, there were the inevitable skeptics who echoed those doubts. But I realized there’s never a perfect time for anything—you just have go for it and keep your eyes on your goal. And my goal was to be a leader and, as such, do something impactful for the company.

I ended up getting the chief of staff job, which led to other roles within AT&T, which, eventually, brought me to where I am today, president of Cricket Wireless. By staying confident and believing in myself and my capabilities; by ensuring that I don’t let others define me; and by embracing change instead of avoiding it, I’ve been able to chart my own course. And that course has included leading Cricket Wireless—one of the most successful consumer brands in the wireless industry.

I’ve taken what many perceive as big risks in my career, but I’ve always viewed them as opportunities. I’ve tackled challenges head-on and I’ve learned to be comfortable with being uncomfortable. I think that’s the key: don’t let perception become reality. If you look for the opportunity, you can always mitigate the risk.”

We welcome your comments at ideas@qz.com.

Source: http://qz.com/486324/this-ceo-says-her-riskiest-career-move-was-becoming-an-engineer

What Happens to Older Developers?

Found a great post which is about “Old coder(s)”, I’m not that old yet, however, just like the author said, I need to plan it, right now, cause what I am now is right what he was, experienced in manny fields, and a developer like that is the least one the employer wants, according to the author’s expierence.

There’s also a Chinese version of this post, you can visit it here: http://www.rosoo.net/a/201404/16945.html
Continue reading “What Happens to Older Developers?”

Yearly summary of 2012

I lost all my documents in the last year because of the hard disk damaged and can not be repaired and recovered, and I was busy attending weddings/birthday parties in the end of the year and the spring festival holiday when I was supposed to be writing the yearly summary document, so as a result turned out, I have only a week-end to prepare it.

It’s not including lot of thoughts and feelings I wished to express, but somehow someday I will make some fix and make it more comprehensive and full covered.


1 2012年综述3
2 本年度的主要研发工作回顾… 3
2.1 Hermes DSS. 3
2.2 UniArgus Express4
2.3 CMS/CVS/CMS 2.3b. 4
2.4 UA Linux(iNVR/e-Look)… 4
2.5 Android SDK.. 5
2.6 Others5
3 部门总结… 5
3.1 人事相关… 5
3.2 部门内的协调与沟通… 5
3.3 部门间沟通… 6
4 个人总结… 6
4.1 UniArgus 相关开发… 7
4.2 服务和协助部门员工… 7
5 UniArgus 阶段性回顾与思考… 8
5.1 Streaming Media分发及稳定性… 8
5.2 ASIO架构下Random crash的问题… 9
5.3 独立的epoll socket module的实现… 9
5.4 改善Server功能逻辑流程… 9
5.5 通用设备… 10
5.6 Android/iOS SDK.. 10
6 寄语2013. 10


Andrew Mason’s Daily Deal: ‘I Got Fired Today’

Andrew Mason被解雇了,该说点啥呢?不知道!好吧,那听听人家是怎么说的?还有Andrew Mason自己是怎么说的?

I don’t root for failure and don’t believe that dancing on graves is ever the way to go. It’s an especially appropriate personal creed when a good guy who I think overplayed his hand decides to retreat throwing rose petals instead of grenades.

Andrew Mason is out as Groupon’s CEO, the end of a relatively brief ride as the marquee pre-Facebook IPO which never lived up to expectations. At the time Groupon went public I argued that the expectations were absurdly high: Sure, daily deals may be a big business, but was it so big that one company could value itself at $16 billion in an industry shared by Amazon and Google and to which the barrier to entry wasn’t all that high anyway?

Within a month of its November 2011 IPO Groupon was slipping, and then sinking, and through it all the Groupon board stuck with Mason and he didn’t blame anyone for anything.

Now in what appears to be a farewell memo, Mason goes out in style:

(This is for Groupon employees, but I’m posting it publicly since it will leak anyway)

People of Groupon,

After four and a half intense and wonderful years as CEO of Groupon, I’ve decided that I’d like to spend more time with my family. Just kidding – I was fired today. If you’re wondering why… you haven’t been paying attention. From controversial metrics in our S1 to our material weakness to two quarters of missing our own expectations and a stock price that’s hovering around one quarter of our listing price, the events of the last year and a half speak for themselves. As CEO, I am accountable.

You are doing amazing things at Groupon, and you deserve the outside world to give you a second chance. I’m getting in the way of that. A fresh CEO earns you that chance. The board is aligned behind the strategy we’ve shared over the last few months, and I’ve never seen you working together more effectively as a global company – it’s time to give Groupon a relief valve from the public noise.

For those who are concerned about me, please don’t be – I love Groupon, and I’m terribly proud of what we’ve created. I’m OK with having failed at this part of the journey. If Groupon was Battletoads, it would be like I made it all the way to the Terra Tubes without dying on my first ever play through. I am so lucky to have had the opportunity to take the company this far with all of you. I’ll now take some time to decompress (FYI I’m looking for a good fat camp to lose my Groupon 40, if anyone has a suggestion), and then maybe I’ll figure out how to channel this experience into something productive.

If there’s one piece of wisdom that this simple pilgrim would like to impart upon you: have the courage to start with the customer. My biggest regrets are the moments that I let a lack of data override my intuition on what’s best for our customers. This leadership change gives you some breathing room to break bad habits and deliver sustainable customer happiness – don’t waste the opportunity!

I will miss you terribly.



I’m no expert, but that kind of style is in short supply. And it may be one of the common characteristics of the current crop of risk-takers who thrive as members of teams and don’t manage the old-fashioned way — by cutting down anyone who might be a threat.

We don’t know what Mason is really thinking, but we sure know how he’s acting. What do you think? Is Mason the kind of boss you’d be sorry to see go? When you’ve been laid off, did you make it point to burn no bridges — or is “take this job and shove it” sometimes the way to go?

Photo: Bloomberg via Getty Images

10 Things Really Amazing Employees Do


Here are ten traits that any great employer should recognize and reward instantly.

Zero Creatives/Getty

As a longtime employer of dozens, I was always grateful to have good employees. It takes a lot to recruit and maintain top talent. Every once in a while special employees come along that just really seem to get it. They drive the entire company forward in ways that were unimaginable. Advancement and reward is never an issue for these rock stars because they understand the power of cause and effect, and only a worthy company can retain them and afford them.

Here are 10 things amazing employees seem to do effortlessly. Here’s how to help your great employees be even more amazing.

1. Enthusiastically Learn All Aspects of Business

They understand they’re part of something bigger and more worthwhile than just their job. They look to learn other areas of the business and be fluent in finance and management so they’ll positively impact multiple areas of the company.

What you can do: Invest in material and seminars on business basics like accounting, marketing, and management so all employees have easy access to learn and grow.

2. Steward the Company

They treat the company as if it were theirs. They look to make prudent decisions about expenses and opportunities with the long-term future of the company in mind. They easily assess risk vs. reward, selflessly when making decisions.

What you can do: Be transparent in your business. The more you share your financials and philosophy, the easier it is for employees to make the right decisions.

3. Generate Viable Opportunities

You don’t have to be in sales or marketing to help a company grow. Strong networkers from all divisions see company growth as a collective effort and constantly keep their eyes open for ways to more than pay for themselves.

What you can do: Make sure all your employees understand your value proposition and can easily identify opportunities. Then reward them openly for their efforts.

4. Resolve Issues Before They Are Issues

My favorite days running companies are when I notice positive change in procedure when I was totally unaware of the need for change. Amazing employees are always looking to improve systems proactively, and they do.

What you can do: Communicate a clear written vision of where the company is going and encourage initiative so people feel safe and empowered to make change.

5. Tell It Like It Is

Amazing employees understand that hiding bad news helps no one. They find kind ways to bring uncomfortable information to the surface, but they DO bring it to the surface. They tell people what’s necessary before major damage is done.

What you can do: Foster an open communication environment where people are not only given permission to tell the truth, but also absolutely required.

6. Demonstrate High Standards, With Low Maintenance

I always feel relaxed when I can trust an employee to perform a task to the same high standards I would expect from myself. Not all can do this without constant attention or difficulty. Amazing employees quietly drive their own high standards.

What you can do: Set the example and the tone for high performance with minimal drama. Publicly reward those who can execute in the same manner.

7. Grow Themselves, and Others

They not only drive their own career but they inspire others to do the same. These employees lead by example in how to advance without creating animosity or resentment. They see and create their perfect future, and also bring others along.

What you can do: Encourage personal development and peer growth through dedicated group time and learning for career advancement.

8. Research, Apply, and Refine

No employer expects people to know everything. In this fast changing world, I choose employees who will learn over those who know. The best employee proactively explores options, takes action and then improves without direction from the top.

What you can do: Invest time in exploration and expansive thinking. Encourage people to explore deep visionary projects with time and reward for the findings.

9. Stimulate Happiness

Amazing employees aren’t always sunshine and roses. They do know how to keep it real. But they understand the dynamics of people, stress, and the blend of work, life and friendship. They are self-aware and able to direct their own path that brings out their best with family, friends and career. They exude positive energy even in stressful times and share it around, making for a happier office.

What you can do: Create an environment where people can openly express themselves. Encourage them to work hard in fulfilling ways and achieve their dreams.

10. Facilitate Amazing Bosses

Amazing employees make me grow as an employer. They self-confidently get their value and help me get mine. They make me want to be worthy of working with somebody of such high caliber, without ever saying it directly of course.

What you can do: Make effort to genuinely show appreciation for any of the behaviors above so people feel their value and will grow to full potential. Then they will do the same for you.








以前还弄不清,一个程序里的 instance 的存在必要。c++智能指针、泛型编程刚有初步的认识。






对于一个刚参加工作(不久)的人来说,可以说是从一个基本上一无所知的状态(很悲哀,中国的大学里所教的东西很少是你毕业后能真正派上用场的,不管你是专 科毕业,还是本科毕业),突然的发现有一大堆的知识需要学习和了解,这对绝大多数人来说都是一个很大的冲击,甚至打击。


一个月,或者三个月的培训期过了之后,不出意外,你就转正了,这时候先不要急着高兴,这个时候往往是更重要的一段时间,主管会给你分派一些简单但正式的工 作,而这些简单的工作则可能会让你自己独立的去完成,这才是真正考验你的时候,公司会考察你的各方面表现,以决定给你委以什么样的任务和角色。对于一个应 届毕业生来说,没有几个公司会在一年半内对你抱太大的期待,而你的任务就是必须要让公司对你有所期待。
同时,尽可能的多了解一下原理性的一些东西,如:把产品的框架都了解清楚,至少要从理论上知道这个框架有什么好,为什么好;另一方面在业余的时间,争取多 补充一些基础知识,像你这样的可以补补C/C++和Linux/Unix相关的知识,这样也可以解决你“就qdbus的基本使用我现在还是迷迷糊糊”的这 种问题。
中国现在的年轻人基本上都是独生子女,平时习惯了“拿来主义”,许多人都喜欢走“捷径”。而以你的状况,我看应该不是会去跟人“拼爹”的那种,自力更生是 你唯一的选择,而如果你想要的是一条“捷径”,我可以很负责任的告诉你,没有。只有一步一个脚印,才能走得更好、更远,从而走出一条捷径。


  • 初级(通常是前两到三年):好好做好所在公司的工作。努力学习和掌握公司产品相关的技术(越多越好),多看多学多问多试多用,同时多阅读一些基础知识相关的资料,尽可能往“深”的方向走,为自己的将来打好基础。
  • 中级(再两到三年):如果你前面的基础已经掌握,那经过那两三年,你应该已经成长为公司的一位主力(之一),然后,再来考虑把自己的视界扩大,逐步往“广”的方面发展。
  • 高级(在一个领域有 五六年的工作经验,并且涉及范围相对广泛):这个时候,你就应该可以不再需要重点考虑“练级”了,自己来好好考虑“职业生涯”这个名词,相信到这个时候你 自己已经有相当的主见和见解,并且具备足够的经验和智慧来解决你所要面对的这种问题了,不管是要考虑继续深入,还是转型,抑或其他。


1. 如果你真的真的一点也不喜欢自己现在在做的工作,那我劝你就不要做了,先好好的去搞清楚自己想要做什么。
2. 如果你有一天要跳槽,尽量做到每份工作做满两年,这样的经验积累才是真正有意义,否则,现实一点就是浪费时间、浪费自己的生命。也许有些人会说,没事,哥年轻,啥都缺,就不缺时间。
3. 要做好一个程序猿,English是very重要的!



《C++程序设计语言》http://product.china-pub.com/196448 ,C++之父的大作。

《泛型编程与STL》http://product.china-pub.com/9864 ,STL无论在什么地方,什么操作系统都是非常有用的,主要学习:

a. Container容器:序列容器, 有vector, list, deque, string. 关联容器, 有set, multiset, map, mulmap, hash_set, hash_map, hash_multiset, hash_multimap, 其他,如stack, queue, valarray, bitset

b. Iterator 迭代器:迭代器统一了容器的访问操作,很好的东西。在迭代器的使用中,常常遇到的一个问题就是,在进行数据的插入删除时的失效问题!其实就是指针的问题哈
c. Algorithm 算法:比如比较、查询、数据移动、复制、交换等等。基础算法:min, max, swap, 排序:sort,替换:replace,查找:find
《Think in C++》http://product.china-pub.com/4801,地球人都知道。

《C++ Primer》http://product.china-pub.com/28767 ,经典。

《Effective C++》http://product.china-pub.com/197414《More Effective C++》(http://product.china-pub.com/197665 )

《设计模式》http://product.china-pub.com/25961 程序猿必读。读至少两遍以上,并思考一下这23个模式的应用场景。主要是两点:1)钟爱组合而不是继承,2)钟爱接口而不是实现。同时推荐阅读一下《深入浅出设计模式》http://product.china-pub.com/27862

《Unix高级环境编程》http://product.china-pub.com/30181 Unix/Linux系 统相关,了解系统层面的东西。从文件系统及其操作开始,到多进程(fork/wait/waitpid)、多线程(pthread)同步或互斥,进程间信 号量通信(signal/kill/raise/alarm/pause/sigprocmask),进程间通信(IPC),网络编程(Socket /select/poll/epoll)等等。当然,还有gcc命令,gdb调试,Makefile。


a.《计算机科学和编程导论》(Introduction to Computer Science and Programming)http://ocw.mit.edu/courses/electrical-engineering-and-computer-science/6-00-introduction-to-computer-science-and-programming-fall-2008/video-lectures/

b. 《C语言内存管理和面向对象编程》(Introduction to C Memory Management and C++ Object-Oriented Programming)